For the ear-weary, expert offers tips to avoid chatty co-worker
By ANITA BRUZZESE
Gannett News Service
If you think you're the only one tired of the incessant talker at your workplace, think again. Just check the Internet, and you'll find more than 3,000 entries under "motormouth." In other words, there are plenty of people fed up with blabbermouths, windbags, chatterboxes and general bores that populate our lives.
But often we feel trapped when a well-known gabber heads our way at work. Maybe they trap us in an office, a cubicle or at the water fountain. After a while, we fear if they don't shut up, they'll suck all the air from the room, leaving us with our ears bleeding and our mouths agape as we grasp for a chance to break free.
"There are all kinds of chatterboxes, from the person who talks nonstop through five hours of golf, to the co-worker who keeps a meeting going on way too long by saying `can you rephrase that?'‚" explains Bill Lampton, a communications expert in Gainesville, Ga.
Lampton says that there are numerous ways to get the windbag in your office to move along and bug someone else so you can get your work done, including:
Offering nonverbal cues. If you continue your work and don't make eye contact, many people take the hint and decide to leave. Don't give them encouragement like saying "uh-huh," or nodding your head.
Give an excuse. OK, the motormouth is too busy talking to get the subtle clues. This is when you say (feel free to interrupt him, by the way): "I can't talk right now because I'm in the middle of a project that is due soon. Let's talk later." Or try, "I've got five minutes. What can we
cover in that amount of time?" Then stick to the time limit and get on the phone or walk away.
Get physical. When children interrupt, parents often hold up a hand like a traffic cop to get their attention and stop them from speaking. The same can work with chatty adults. "I can't get into this now. Please send me a note or schedule an appointment to talk about it later." Or simply walk away from the person, making the excuse to use the restroom or get a drink of water.
Enlist help. Lampton's father used a buzzer under his desk to signal his secretary to "rescue" him from windbags. "Anyone can do that. Ask a co-worker to come and get you if you're not done with the person in 15 minutes," Lampton says. "And then you can return the favor."
Intercept. Keep the person from trapping you in an office or other confined space where you are at their mercy.
If you see them coming, grab the phone and pretend to be talking to someone, then don't look up when they come your way. Lampton says he knows a man who immediately puts on headphones on an airplane, even though he listens to nothing. This keeps others from talking to him.
But what if the gabber is your boss?
"That's even more reason to say you're busy working on the project, so ask if you can talk later, or what is critical to be discussed immediately," Lampton says.
The Productivity Institute estimates that 20 percent of the average workday is spent on "crucial" and "important" things, while 80 percent is spent on things that have "little value" or "no value." Eliminating even one motormouth in one meeting can provide relief.
Says Lampton: "If you've got a person that just talks and talks, interrupt him and say, `That sounds like a fine idea. We don't have time for discussing it further now, so please summarize your suggestion in writing later today. Nothing elaborate, just a one or two page outline of your plan. Now, I think someone else had something for consideration...'‚"
Enough said.
Write to Anita Bruzzese c/o: Business Editor, Gannett News Service, 7950 Jones Branch Drive, McLean, Va. 22107. For a reply, include a SASE.
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