By ANITA BRUZZESE
Courier-Post Staff

When you enter your workplace, do you become someone else -- perhaps someone your closest friends and relatives or even yourself would not recognize?

Many people admit they have taken on personality traits they find unfamiliar, maybe even undesirable, because of a job.

Shirley Garrett, who speaks on workplace issues, says people lose sight of who they are when they get caught up in the stresses of a job.

For example, she said, the widespread lack of civility in the workplace is a reflection of how even those with good manners "become more accepting of those who show little respect to others, so we become more like them."

"We sort of shrug our shoulders and say, `Well, if they don't care, then I don't either,'‚" Garrett said. "But then we become part of the problem."

There are several areas workers need to address individually to make themselves happier and better employees and better co-workers.

• The physical. Garrett said taking care of your body is critical if you want to operate well in the workplace.

"I'm talking about things like sleep deprivation," she said. "It's huge. We're trying to cram too much into one day, and we're just running on empty.

"This country spends more than anyone else on improving our outward appearance, yet we're falling apart on the inside. We eat junk food on the run and don't exercise. We even forget to breathe."

• The intellectual. Once school is finished, many believe the learning is over.

But Garrett said we must embrace lifelong learning. "The more that is done to stimulate our intellect, the more we broaden our horizons and that helps us become more accepting of those who are different from us."

• The spiritual. "This is the overriding thing that is missing in the workplace, and I'm not talking about religion. I'm talking about a connection with a greater source of power, that we see we're part of a bigger plan. It helps us become less isolated. We take action for the greater good. We're aware of others. We're kinder when it's hard to be kind."

• The social. Garrett said she has seen first hand "distancing" in workplaces, which enables people to show less respect for one another. This attitude ultimately affects productivity, quality and efficiency and that hurts the bottom line of any business.

• The psychological. First, people must determine who they are inside their values, their belief system, their personal integrity.

"Many of us believe that we're `less than' someone or something else," she said. "If only we had more money. If only we were better looking. If only we were smarter -- then we'd be OK.

"But that means that we're defining ourselves based on some kind of model. And we just can't be anything but who we are."

Write to Anita Bruzzese c/o: Business Editor, Gannett News Service, 1000 Wilson, Blvd., Arlington, Va. 22229-0001. For a reply, include a self-addressed, stamped envelope.